Still Waiting

This little guy was added to the list of children at the same time that Tegan was. He is STILL on the list and so are many others that have been waiting for a very long time. I was so sad to come upon some of these familiar faces the other day. It made me even more grateful that I just happened to be looking at the list of children on my Yahoo group when I spotted little Tegan in his big blue shoes. And I know people will say "Ya these kids are cute and deserve a chance but what about foster care in the US?" BUT children born in the US at least have a chance. They have opportunities. I included text from a great article below this picture for anyone that is interested about why it is so sad when children "age out" of the adoption program at 14 in China. Yes I feel bad for children in the US too. I do. But children around the world that age out, and never have someone see them in a photo and recognize their great worth, have LITTLE chance at thriving and sometimes even surviving in the real world.

 "Many people do not realize the deep and ingrained stigma that an orphaned child often faces in Chinese society. Orphans are often felt to be unlucky or even “cursed,” and so they often have many strikes against them when it comes time to go to school or find a job. There are many different levels of schools in China; many orphaned children are only able to attend the lowest level schools, as parents who are paying higher fees for the better schools don’t want their children to have to attend with “unlucky” orphans. Education is so important in Chinese society, and parents often push their children to try harder and work longer on their homework. Orphaned children rarely have anyone pushing them or encouraging them, and so we frequently work with young teens who only have rudimentary educations and who have trouble believing their lives will ever be better. The few dozen children in orphanages whom we have been honored to sponsor for college are the exception. To actually make it to university as an orphaned child is a true achievement. And even after graduating, jobs are often very difficult to come by due to businesses again not wanting to employ people who might bring bad luck to the company. Many of you might remember the young lady we helped earn an accounting degree in college a few years ago. She was unable to find a job in her hometown because of her orphan status. She was finally hired by the local government when no private company would agree to hire her.

 Some people might ask how anyone would know you were an orphan after you left the institution. Couldn’t you just keep it quiet? There are several factors that make it hard to ever lose your “orphan” status.  The first is your hukou, the formal registration status that every individual in China has. Your hukou is family-based in your home city, and orphaned children often have a “group” hukou that clearly identifies them as not having a family. In addition, in the past it was very common for orphanages to use “created” surnames for the children in their care. For example, many orphanages used the last name of “Fu,” which directly implies an orphan, or else they used the first syllable of the town or district, such as Shan or Mei. These “created” surnames often immediately identify a child as not having a real family. Because of this, and knowing the trouble that orphaned children often have assimilating into Chinese society, the government has recently been giving children more common last names, such as Li or Chang.
 Almost everything in Chinese society revolves around the family, and great reverence is giving to one’s ancestors and lineage. During major holidays, if at all possible, you return to your family. For orphaned children who age out of the social welfare system, they often find life very difficult with no family ties, and they frequently live on the margins of society."